In 2009, Adrian Helmsley, an American geologist, visits astrophysicist Dr. Satnam Tsurutani in India and learns that neutrinos from a massive solar flare are causing the temperature of the Earth's core to rapidly increase. Arriving at a party in Washington D.C., Helmsley presents his info to White House Chief of Staff Carl Anheuser who takes him to meet the President. In 2010, U.S. President Thomas Wilson and other international leaders begin a secret project to ensure humanity's survival. More than 400,000 people are chosen to board enormous "arks" constructed at Cho Ming, Tibet, in the southwest Chinese Himalayas. A Buddhist monk named Nima is evacuated while his brother Tenzin joins the Ark project. Additional funding is raised by selling tickets for €1 billion per person. By 2011, valuable items are moved to the arks with the help of art expert and First Daughter Dr. Laura Wilson. In 2012, Jackson Curtis is a science fiction writer in Los Angeles who works as a limousine driver for Russian billionaire Yuri Karpov. Jackson's ex-wife Kate, and their children Noah and Lilly, live with Kate's boyfriend, plastic surgeon Gordon Silberman. Jackson takes Noah and Lilly camping in Yellowstone National Park. After an encounter with Helmsley, they meet Charlie Frost, who hosts a radio show from the park. Charlie plays a video of Charles Hapgood's theory that polar shifts and the Mesoamerican Long Count Calendar predict that the 2012 phenomenon will occur. Charlie also tells Jackson that those who discovered this and plotted to inform the public were killed in various accidents. After an earthquake hits Los Angeles, the family returns home. Jackson grows suspicious and rents a Cessna 340 to rescue his family. He collects his family and Gordon as Earth crust displacement begins with a magnitude 10.9 earthquake, and they narrowly escape Los Angeles as California collapses into the Pacific Ocean. As millions of people die in earthquakes worldwide, the group flies to Yellowstone to retrieve a map from Charlie, escaping as the Yellowstone Caldera erupts. Charlie stays behind to broadcast the eruption and is killed. Learning that the arks are in China, the group lands in Las Vegas to find a larger plane. They find Yuri, his twin sons Alec and Oleg, girlfriend Tamara and pilot Sasha. Helmsley, Anheuser, and Laura Wilson are aboard Air Force One where they are heading to the arks. President Wilson remains in Washington D.C. to address the nation one last time. With the Vice President dead and the Speaker of the House missing, Anheuser appoints himself Acting Commander in Chief even though he is not in the presidential line of succession. Back in Las Vegas, the group steals an Antonov An-500 aircraft and they depart for China as the Yellowstone ash cloud engulfs the city. President Wilson is later killed by a megatsunami that sends the aircraft carrier USS John F. Kennedy crashing into the White House. When the group arrive in China, the plane runs out of fuel and crashes into a glacier, killing Sasha, while the others make a narrow escape. They are then spotted by helicopters from the Chinese army. Yuri and his sons, possessing tickets, are taken to the arks, leaving the Curtis family and Gordon behind along with Tamara because Yuri knows she had an affair with Sasha. The remaining group are picked up by Nima and taken to the arks with her grandparents. They stow away on Ark 4, where the United States contingent is aboard, with the help of Tenzin. As a megatsunami approaches the site, an impact driver becomes lodged in the gears of the ark's hydraulic doors, preventing a boarding gate from closing, which in turn prevents the ship from starting its engines. In the ensuing chaos, Yuri, Gordon and Tamara are killed, and Ark 4 is set adrift. Jackson and Noah dislodge the impact driver and the crew regains control of the ark before it collides with Mount Everest. Jackson rejoins with his family, and he and Kate reconcile. As flood waters from the tsunamis slowly recede, the arks travel to the Cape of Good Hope in South Africa. Helmsley starts a relationship with Laura.?

When Bobby Saint and Mickey Duka meet with European arms dealer Otto Krieg at the Tampa, Florida seaport, the FBI intervenes and Saint is killed while Duka is jailed. "Krieg", supposedly killed in the shootout, is actually undercover FBI agent and former U.S. Army Delta Force operator Frank Castle. Shortly thereafter, he retires from the FBI and attends a family reunion at his father's oceanside home in Aguadilla Bay, Puerto Rico. Tampa crime boss Howard Saint is enraged by the death of his son, and with right-hand man Quentin Glass bribes the FBI for confidential information about "Krieg". Saint orders Castle murdered, and Saint's wife, Livia, demands Castle's entire family be killed as well to "settle the score". At the reunion, gunmen including Glass and John Saint, Bobby's identical twin, kill most of the extended family. Castle and his father kill several of the attackers before Castle's father is killed. Castle's wife and son try to escape in a Jeep, but Saint runs over them with a truck, killing them. Castle, shot in the chest and blown off a pier in an explosion set by Glass, survives and is nursed back to health by a local fisherman, Candelaria. Once recovered, Castle goes to Tampa and takes refuge in an old tenement where three young outcasts — Dave, Bumpo and Joan — live. Castle abducts Duka, who fearfully gives up information about the Saints — whom he, too, hates, and so willingly becomes Castle's mole. Castle starts exacting revenge on the police and FBI agents who have been bribed to close the investigation of his family's murder. In the process, he sabotages Saint's money-laundering business and severs Saint's partnership with Cuban mobsters the Toro Brothers, and starts tailing Livia and Glass, whom he learns is a closeted homosexual. Saint, realizing Castle is alive, sends two assassins to kill him. Castle kills the first, guitar player Harry Heck, by shooting a ballistic knife into Heck's throat. The second is "the Russian", a behemoth who beats Castle in a brutal fight but is defeated when Castle throws boiling oil in his face, blinding him long enough for Castle to throw him down a staircase, breaking his neck. Moments later, Saint's men arrive, led by Glass and John Saint. Dave, Joan and Bumpo hide Frank and refuse to tell Glass where he is, despite Glass sadistically pulling out Dave's multiple facial piercings with a pair of pliers. They leave a man behind to kill Castle upon his return, but Castle kills him once Glass and the others are gone. With assistance from Mickey, Castle manipulates Saint into believing Glass and Livia are having an affair. Saint, unaware Glass is gay, and believing Livia to be capable of cheating on him, kills them both personally, neither of them knowing why. Castle attacks Saint's headquarters, the downtown Tampa nightclub Saints and Sinners, killing many of Saint's henchmen. He kills John Saint by having the crime boss' son hold an eight-pound, trip-wire activated grenade until his arm wearies and the grenade explodes, killing him. Castle wounds Howard Saint with a pistol when Saint attempts to shoot him in the parking lot of the nightclub. Castle then ties Saint to a slow-moving car, but not before revealing that Glass and Livia were not having an affair. Several hidden bombs go off, and the destruction and wreckage culminate in the shape of the Punisher's iconic skull. Later that night, Castle returns to his apartment and prepares to commit suicide, but after a brief vision of his wife, decides to continue his vigilante mission against others who in his mind deserve punishment. Before departing on his next mission, he leaves most of Saint's money for Bumpo, Joan and Dave. On the Sunshine Skyway Bridge, he vows, "Those who do evil to others — the killers, the rapists, psychos, sadists — will come to know me well. Frank Castle is dead. Call me the Punisher."

Two scientists, Dr. Elena Kinder (Diane Keaton) and Dr. Heep (Christopher Lloyd), use genius-baby studies to fund BabyCo's theme park "Joyworld". According Dr. Kinder's Research, babies are supposed to possess vast, universal knowledge and speak a secret yet impossible-to-translate baby prelanguage called "Babytalk". At age two, however, the knowledge and language are lost as the babies "cross over" by learning how to talk. Most of the babies that were raised in Dr. Kinder's vast, underground research facility were adopted from the Pasadena orphanage, transformed into geniuses through use of the Kinder Method, and then used in experiments to decipher the language used by the baby-geniuses. One mischievous toddler, Sylvester (AKA Sly), makes repeated attempts to escape Dr. Kinder's research facility and one night, Sylvester goes into a dirty diaper truck and he actually succeeds. The next morning, one things Sylvester does not expect is to run into his twin, Whit, in a mall playground. Although Sylvester and Whit share a telepathic bond, they have no idea of each other's existence. While the guards from Dr. Kinder's research facility capture Whit, mistake him for Sylvester, and take him back to Dr. Kinder's research facility, Sylvester is taken home by Whit's adopted mother, Robin (Kim Cattrall), who is Dr. Kinder's niece. After Dr. Kinder is horrified that Whit and Sylvester switched at the mall, she decides to do a cross evaluation on Sylvester and Whit. However, when she comes to Dan Bobbin's place, she realizes that Dan Bobbin can understand babies. After the attempts to retrieve Sylvester fail, Dr. Kinder decides to move the research facility to Lichtenstein, so that they can transform Whit into becoming a genius thanks to him getting bred by the Kinder Method (thus erasing his memories about his foster parents, foster brothers and foster sisters) and use him as an experiment to crack the code to "Babytalk". The babies at Bobbin's place hypnotize Lenny (Dom DeLuise), the bus driver to drive to Dr. Kinder's research facility. Once at the research facility, Sylvester goes to the control room to set the robots from the theme park on the lab scientists. When the Bobbins return home, their natural daughter Carrie tells her father that the children are in Dr. Kinder's research facility. At the end of the fight Dr. Kinder captures Whit and takes him to the helicopter pad on the roof. Robin and Dan chase them to the roof, where Dr. Kinder reveals that she and Robin are not related, and that Robin was adopted at age two. After Dr. Kinder got arrested by the police, Sylvester and Whit come together on the roof to cross over. Dan and Robin adopt Sylvester. Dan is still curious of the secrets of life, but as the twins have crossed over they no longer know those secrets. Carrie, their sister, doesn't reveal anything (just gives her dad a sly smile) because adults aren't meant to know their secrets.